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  • Writer's pictureNyaria Lee


I did the thing. I bought a house!

At this moment I can honestly say that I feel like a REAL adult. One of my biggest goals in life has finally been accomplished and I couldn’t be prouder of myself for sticking with it even though the road to get here was far from smooth. But, buying a house and being one of the first in my family to begin creating generational wealth was soooo worth it.

Buying a house has been on my goals list for years literally YEARS and this momma has made it happen.

Mixed Emotions

Not gonna lie. Holding down the fort as a busy momma and going through the home buying process was nothing short of a rollercoaster ride and I’m not talking the kiddie ride. I’m talking about the roller coasters that you see from the freeway driving pass six flags. The ones that take you to the highest points and before dropping you an inch from the ground, twist and turn you a few times making your stomach churn. I’m talking about the up and down emotions you experience going through everyday life as a busy momma trying to keep your schedule together while getting all your paperwork in, in a timely manner. Or, looking at beautiful homes just to be told that all the homes you absolutely love and imagined yourself in are not in your budget.

While the process was totally worth it and the feeling of a being a first-time homeowner in this crazy market is a feeling like no other. There are a few things that I wish I would’ve done differently.

So, while I love to talk about all thing’s motherhood. I also want to support all my fellow mommas and share my experience as another momma buying her first home. So here goes…

Should’ve, Could’ve, Would’ve

Surprisingly, the process went by a lot faster than I thought it would, but it was still nothing short of mixed emotions during this time: excitement, disappointment, hopefulness, frustration, nervousness, relief and then back to excitement. Even after doing research on google and talking with others. I realize there were still things that SHOULD’VE been done, people that COULD’VE helped me and information that WOULD’VE been beneficial prior to going through the process.

What I should’ve done

Like everyone else, I pictured and dreamed about the house that I wanted. I drove around neighborhoods, looked at pictures and searched the internet for inspiration for what I wanted. I had an idea that I would have this gorgeous two-story house with 3-4 bedrooms, large backyard, large kitchen with a spacious pantry and much more. Then…reality set in. I quickly realized the difference between what you’re qualified for, what makes sense for your budget and what you want. Long blog short, understanding your own financial situation allows you to be realistic about what you could have even if it’s not the ultimate dream home you desire (…at this time). I knew where my credit score was but what I should’ve done was calculate my own DTI (debt to income ratio) to get a better understanding of what I could realistically afford.

What I could’ve done

Oh ladies, the things I could’ve done. After closing on my house, I felt this huge sense of relief. Finally, I was done submitting every piece of financial paperwork. I was done proving my identity and was ready to pump it up and create the best blog/YouTube content ever. Looking back on the process there was so much I could’ve done to make my life easier. One of those things were shopping for different lenders BEFORE settling on one. Different lenders offer different rates, incentives, etc. For the first time ever, I didn’t shop around first. I applied and went with the first one and then later had to change several times to find the best lender for my situation. So much time could’ve been saved had I shopped around first.

What I wish I would’ve done

Lastly, as much as I prepped, I knew I could’ve been more prepared. I knew that I could’ve saved more, joined local communities, and really educated myself on new construction homes which is what I ultimately went with. At the end of the day, I’m happy with my home and I’m loving all the quirks of homeownership and while loving everything, there is some regret with not realizing that I had more “power” in my situation than I knew I did at the time. Knowing this would’ve gotten me so much farther when putting in offers and generally understanding the lending process.

To spread a little positivity and advice, from one busy momma to another:

1. Take your time and do what’s best for your financial situation. Everyone’s situation is different, so everyone won’t take the same path but it’s always best to understand where you are mentally and financially.

2. Check your credit report, know your credit score, and calculate that DTI. Doing these things gives you an understanding of what kind of buyer you are before you talk to a lender.

3. Research, talk with others and check YouTube for helpful videos. Of course, you can’t believe everything you see and hear on the internet but there were some videos that I found helpful when trying to understand certain acronyms and language.

If you’re looking for a home, I’m sending you so much love and positivity. You got this momma! Feel free to share some comments and tips on the website if you’re currently going through the process and/or have gone through the home buying process before.

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